Wednesday, November 19, 2014

THE WRITTEN WORD | Passing Thoughts

Is it any coincidence that every since article on MindBodyGreen's daily roundup for today was spot on something I needed to read?  I don't think that has ever happened before.  I also can't remember when I first began to lose interest in the fine art of writing my soul out.  That is what this blog was originally started for - way back when in the land of 2009.  An era of greatness amongst bloggers.  Those who started then, have grown into stardom - well, blogger stadom, anyway.  That isn't saying much, but it is saying that unlike myself, they are resilient.  What happened to my resilience, my tenacity, my will to move forward, to write every day no matter what stood in my way?

Lately, I've read a lot on the necessity to slow down.  Along with the slowing down of one's life comes the willingness to add more substance back into it.  This gives us the time to read more books, forge hand-written letters, & participate in real conversations - in person!  I've began to make myself tea more often, delighting in the whistle of the kettle, the aroma of the fragrant steam coming from the steeping goodness that will soon be in my belly.  The waiting time for tea is not long, but for some reason it seems easier to go to a shop & order a cup to go, or perhaps use a Keurig, or just forego the ritual for some instant drink of our choosing.  The same process I've been using for tea also goes into the steeping of a good pot of French-press coffee.  Yes, I know, Chemex brewing is all the rage right now, but I don't see anything wrong with sticking to a classic.  I can also justify this antiquity by reasoning that the filters from brewing with a Chemex system can be cumbersome - producing a waste one can avoid by using a French-press.  Regardless, the ritual of drinking tea & reading a book at night has become one that reminds me to slow down in other areas of my life.

The word quaint comes to mind.

Quaint, adjective: attractively unusual or old-fashioned.

What happened to me, was I got busy.  Last year I was going to school full time, working part time, & trying to plan my DIY wedding.  Through all of this, not only did I lose the love I had for documenting momentous aspects of my life, but I also forgot to simply write down the little things.  I was definitely not living a quaint life.  Social media was everything, & began to take its toll on my happiness.  My way of life changed due to quick hellos, & very little substantial conversation. 

After the wedding, Jonathan & I began to plant vegetables in our raised bed gardens we have as a front yard, I inherited my grandmother's Wurlitzer console piano, & I began to simply make myself tea.  I used to read every single night before that precious time was taken over by the necessity to read for school, instead of for pleasure.  With tea making, I have also began to take back that time & read on a nightly basis once again.  The topping on that cake will be just this.  Instead of comparing my life to that of one I cannot fully live, one that I don't have the time or means for, one that I've never been 100% set on, I have decided to write my heart out.  

In passing, it seems as though staying busy put me at odds with myself, bringing up a competitive side of me that never surfaced before.  Instead of quaint, I was living fast, new, & typical.  I began to be less genuine, & lost myself in the flurry of competition - wanting to be just like everyone else.  

The best class I've ever taken was my Children's Lit course at community college.  I learned so much about who I wanted to be, who I am, & who I am afraid to become.  I learned that people are multidimensional characters who might not always want to go on adventures.  Hey, you know what I learned, sometimes it's okay to not be busy, booked to the brim, sometimes it's okay to be bored.  

Maybe the negative space will give me more time to ponder, to write, to live authentically - only, my version of authenticity.  Because if it's not your own, who's life are you living?

Happy hump day, friends.

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