Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Going Out | Going In

It's a weird thing, that being outside only makes me want to be outside more.  When I'm in, I want to get out, when I'm out, I don't have that urge to go back in.  Don't get me wrong, when I say "in," I mean inside a building, a home, a shelter - civilization.  When I say "out," I mean really far out - into the wild, away from civilization - away from the chaos, & the noise.

I'd love to be able to ignore everyday irks, ignorances, snide comments, opinions that should be kept to themselves.  But I guess a big part of life is being able to live in harmony with people's judgements & critiques, & learn to just brush them off.  Not caring is SO HARD for me, though.  To not care what people think is something I'd love to learn to do.  I suppose this is why I love going "out" so much.  Being away from the negativity is easier than dealing with it.  I suppose even while I'm here I don't necessarily have to deal with it ... I could just brush it off.  Maybe that is my big lesson of the year - to learn how to be okay with other people's issues, & not take them on as my own, or care to try & process them.

Going outside really makes me think about the deeper things in life.  The things that really matter, love, happiness, friendship, family, freedom, truth.  I used to walk in order to think.  I used to hike in order to contemplate.  It seems like an age old tradition - one of scholars & mystics.  Vision quests & pilgrimages, alike.  I crave the outdoors.  

Lately, my musical tastes have been mimicking my feelings about nature, mysticism, spirituality, & the whole:

"I only went out for a walk, and finally concluded to stay out till sundown, for going out, I found, was really going in."
― John Muir, John of the Mountains: The Unpublished Journals of John Muir, (1938)

Listening to music like this makes me feel like, even though I'm sitting here at some boring office job, I'm getting a taste of my wildness.  This album, Faces in the Rocks by Mariee Sioux, is especially mystical, natural, & ancient.  It is everything I'm feeling lately.  Have a listen.


  1. That is one of my all-time favorite John Muir quotes. Such a wise, wise man.